Bonnie and Clyde
by NoahPuckermansWifey
Summary: Bella and Jacob are up to something. What is it?


**Jacob: Well, well …well. We meet again my dear…**

**Bella: *smacks Jacob on the back of his wonderfully gorgeous head* Jacob Ephraim Black! Don't pick on the poor girl! She just wrote this wonderful story about us! Show some appreciation!**

**Jacob: Alright, alright! Damn woman! You didn't have to hit me!!**

**Jake looks deep into my eyes and proclaims his love for me then … he kisses me deeply and passionately.**

**Me: Well damn…if this is what I get every time I write a fic about you guys…I'll write them more often!!**

**Bella: Ahem…**

**Jacob and I: *look at Bella innocently* yes...?**

**Bella: Are you forgetting something??**

**We look at her confused…**

**Bella:*sigh* the disclaimer…**

**Me: Oh yes that's right…sorry guys I was too busy kissing Jake's delicious lips *giggle giggle***

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or anything to do with it except for this plot…the characters and everything else belong to Ms. Meyer *sob sob sob* I wish I owned Jacob…**

**Bonnie and Clyde**

It started out like any other typical Friday night for one James Laurent and his sister Victoria. They had arrived at the bar less than twenty minutes ago and were scanning for beautiful women as this bar had the best selection. And yes, in case you have not figured it out already, Victoria is most definitely a lesbian.

Anyways back to the story…they were scanning the bar as usual when Victoria's attention was pulled to the door where she spotted the most beautiful woman she had ever seen.

She had just walked in and went straight to the bar as if she was here all the time. She took her tan overcoat off, sat on a stool and began chatting with the barman who looked suspiciously identical to her. She was wearing a very short red dress that had a v-neckline that plunged deeply, exposing her large breasts. Her dress hugged her vixen like curves in all the right places emphasizing her shapely hips and ass. She had on minimal make up and her plump, kissable pink lips were left bare, with a natural blush. To tie the look together she was wearing blood red kitten heels that looked to be diamond encrusted and from where she was sitting, Victoria could tell they were real diamonds. '_She must be loaded'_ Victoria thought.

Her beautiful chocolate eyes did a quick scan of the area until they landed on a still clueless James beside her. _'Damn' _Victoria groaned inwardly, _'she's straight.' _

_'What a fine specimen he is,'_ she thought as she observed her target patiently drumming her fingers on the countertop of the bar, _'yes, yes he will definitely do.'_

She took a few minutes to think up a fool proof plan to get him out of the bar because she already knew what she wanted to do with him once they got out. She called Paul Uley, who was one of the owners of the bar, over to place an order.

"Paul," she said quietly, "send a drink over to that blonde man sitting next to the red head at that table over there."

Paul merely raised an eyebrow at his baby sister indicating that he was clearly amused by the not so surprising turn of events. He and his two brothers Sam and Jared were the only ones who knew what occupation their little sister was involved in.

"Already B?" he asked cryptically so as not to accidentally reveal anything.

"You know it," she answered coolly. She knew that the only people that she could trust, besides her long time partner, were her three older brothers because they would do anything for her and supported her no matter what she did.

Paul had been helping his Little B with her occupation for a few years now but she still managed to impress him with the amount of calmness she maintained. They all knew though that if they did not have each other, they all would have cracked long ago when it was still early on in the game.

"All right then B, got a message for this one?" he asked as he prepared yet another ones drink and ultimately the man's fate.

"Of course dear brother, do you know me to not have a certain special message for each and every one of them?" she laughed. "Tell him to meet me outside so we can have some … 'fun'." She then proceeded to stand, gather her things and put her coat back on. With one last wink at her ever helpful brother she made her way to the door where her eldest brothers stood acting as bouncers.

"Sam, Jared," she said bowing her head as was expected of any respectable Quileute woman when in the presence of a male.

"B," they answered nodding their heads at her simultaneously as she walked out the door.

"Got him B?" a familiar voice asked her from the shadows.

"Yes," she replied to her partner in the same quiet tone. "Now I want you to follow us but do not, under any circumstances, let him see or hear you at all no matter how angry you get. Got it?"

He nodded his head and stepped further back into the shadows as James stumbled out of the bar.

"Baby," he exclaimed.

_'He's clearly drunk of his ass,'_ she thought smirking inwardly. _'Absolutely perfect.'_

"Well hello there sexy," she purred seductively watching with well masked disgust as the lust in his eyes – and the hilariously small bulge in his pants – grew.

"The name's James Laurent by the way," he slurred drunkenly as he walked holding her hand. She already knew this little tidbit of information thanks to her brothers' investigations but he did not really need to know that. "What's yours?"

"Tell you what, I will tell you my name after we are done with our 'fun' but you can just call me B for now," she said pulling him into a dark alley where they were sure to remain unseen and unheard.

"Here," he questioned panting as he pinned her against the brick wall of the building behind them and the kissed down the column of her throat while simultaneously groping her ass.

Her partner was absolutely seething on the other side of the alley just waiting for her signal. He watched with hatred burning deep in his eyes as the disgustingly drunk ass bastard felt her up and placed sloppy kisses on her.

"Hang on I want to try something," she said kneeling down in front of him slowly reaching for his belt buckle and …

BANG!!

A deafening gunshot echoed through the empty alley as James froze and slowly fell over to the side.

"The name's Bella Black by the way," she smirked as her husband and partner in crime, Jacob Black, put his gun away and helped her up to her feet.

"Record time baby," Jacob complimented her before pulling her body flush against his to kiss her passionately as a promise of what would happen when they got home.

"Well yes," she panted breathlessly, "he was the most revolting one."

"I swear if he would have touched your ass one more time, I would have beat the shit right fucking out of him before shooting his bastard ass to death," he growled angrily, kicking the dead corpse to emphasize his point.

"Jealous sweetheart," Bella teased her husband delighting in his possessiveness of her and his slightly protective nature. She knew that if he was not always there on the missions with her then there was no way in hell he would ever let her do these things.

"He should have fucking known that you belong to me and me only," he said with a seductive smirk of his own.

"Last time I checked baby, I belonged to myself," she laughed.

"Well we'll just have to see about that," he said still smirking, "you ready Bonnie?"

"Let's go Clyde," she purred as they sauntered out of the dirty alley gracefully his arm around her shoulders and her hand in his back pocket.

"All I need in this life of sin is me and my girlfriend (me and my Girlfriend)  
Down to ride 'til the very end, it's me and my boyfriend (me and My boyfriend)" – Jay-Z and Beyonce, '03 Bonnie and Clyde.

_Fin._


End file.
